Covers. It's the easiest way to get your friends and friends of friends to come see your band. Promise an awesome Led cover and suddenly everyone appears hammered screaming "STAIRWAY!"
But some credence should be given to the artists who take a well-known song and cover it until it's a new entity entirely.
And so I give you the top ten best song covers (you may not have heard).
10. Dead Kennedys; Viva Las Vegas
I'm not sure that there's much I can write about this cover. It's a song EVERYBODY knows and, some how, DK turned it from a song of love to Las Vegas into an anthem of the crazy shit you can get into. Leave it to a punk band to make me want to go to Vegas.
9. Newton Faulkner; Teardrops
I love Massive Attack's song Teardrop secretly (until now). Fuck House, it's a good song. One night at work I put it on and my coworker Britt said "You need to hear this guy cover it with guitar slaps". Whatever to my ears. Then I watched it. I can fathom how he's keeping his tone. It's beautiful. I wish this guy and I could go to Bonnaroo together and find an empty bathroom stall.
8. Rasputina; Wish You Were Here
The first song any musician learns in and out on their guitar is Wish You Were Here by Pink Floyd. It's simple, it's resonate and it's beautiful. But I have never heard another band take it in such a different direction than Rasputina. Their transposition of the solo to acoustic cello, the opening lines, it's almost a completely different take on the song and it's just lovely.
7. Machine Head; Message in a Bottle
Do I know machine head well? No. Do I know The Police well. A road trip to and from Atlanta, yes I do. This is a nice turn on the song. It takes a song that's hard to play for people who don't know that The Police beget Sting and opens it up to the masses. A song about love with a hard rock twist needs to be given at least one listen.
6. Aurora; Ordinary World
I'd bet money you've heard this before but have never been able to place it. Ordinary World came off Duran Duran's album Duran Duran (The Wedding Album) along with Come Undone (along with a slew of other sort of sad songs from the band that gave you Hungry Like the Wolf). I'll admit, I have trouble listening to Duran Duran's 80'd pop rock but Aurora's cover of Ordinary World is one part pop rock and one part the emotion that was going into the original album.
5. Apocalyptica; Nothing Else Matters
Metal Heads may not love this cover (though my theory remains that a true music loving metal head will) but with all my vitriol with Metallica following their infamous "NO ONE WILL HAVE OUR MUSIC FOR FREE" hypocrisy I love this cello centric cover. It cuts right back to the lost and empty feeling present in Nothing Else Matters and is technically astounding.
4. Matt Weddle; Hey Ya
If you grew up in the '00's then you heard Hey Ya by Andre' 3000 of Outkast a million goddamn times. We all know the song. We all know the history. We've all heard somebody jamming out alone to it while they wash dishes. But Matt Weddle's cover is a completely different take and even made me (cynical as I am) stop and think about the lyrics (to HEY YA). It's folkish and fasicnating.
3. The Flaming Lips, Stardeath, White Dwarfs and Henry Rollins; Dark Side of the Moon
I'm not a huge fan of The Flaming Lips nor am I a fan of Dark Side of the Moon covers. I worked in a record store for a year so I've just about had my fill of "Dark Side REGGAE" "Dark Side PUNK". And The Flaming Lips just never did it for me. Another one of those bands I like one or two songs but the rest... meh. But I LOVE Henry Rollins SO I had to play this album if for, nothing else, to hear how he contributed. And I was amazed. So many Dark Side covers are the EXACT album with a little flavor thrown in. This album took the work, twisted it, expanded upon it and created something that not only gave a nod to the original album but created something dynamic and fascinating.
2. Christopher Walken; Poker Face
Ok, he's not a band. But he's Christopher Walken. FIN.
1. Rasputina; Barracuda
I Love Rasputina. I'm biased because I'm a trained cellist who loves women centric bands that don't revel in "Your lover left you and you're angry SUPER CHORD SCREAM PROCESSION". Rasputina run the gamut in their albums cycling from blues to "goth rock" to classical but it's their covers that cement them in the hearts of the listeners who don't have my particular biases. I already mentioned them once in this list, but this cover takes the cake if in nothing else that no one who ever hears it for the first time realizes that it is ONLY cellos and a drummer.
There are of course many other brilliant covers, but my attention span is only so long these days.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Monday, February 21, 2011
The Top Ten Best Actor's Return To Form
Hey, acting is hard. Not only does a person have to embody a character they may have never encountered, there's also the issue of where the role is coming from. As a result, there is a multitude of talented people who are almost completely unrealized due to their most popular work being also their weakest. But that doesn't mean the actor hasn't had the role that defined the work they could do. And so I give you, the top ten best actor's return to form.
10. Catherine Keener
Where you're most likely to have seen her last.
The 40 Year Old Virgin
Where she returned to her form.
Capote
Why you should care:
Catherine Keener is beautiful, talented and not under the age of 30. Most women in this area play the hip mom until the day they fade away ancient at 50 or start playing the hip grandmother who shows her bra at Thanksgiving yet gives enlightening love advice to the young startlets who can't choose between their sweet high school friend who's down to earth or their slick money loving fiancee who hates kittens. Catherine Keener is doing a wonderful job of maintaining work in demanding roles that don't pigeon-hole her as "the character who's not 24 or at least looks 24".
9. Katey Sagal
Where you're most likely to have seen her.
Peg of Married With Children
Where she returned to form.
Leela of Futurama and Gemma Teller Morrow of Sons of Anarchy
Why you should care:
As television has its way of doing, Katey Sagal was poised to go down in history as the dumbass wife of a man whose catchphrase involved the flushing of a toilet. I'm not a huge fan of the motorcycle soap opera, but if Sagal proves anything in her role it's that she can play more than a leopard-print stereotype. And if Sons of Anarchy isn't enough proof, watch a few episodes of Futurama and you'll find her voice can do more than hit a falsetto at the end of "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!" And while we're on the subject...
8. Ed O'Neill
Where you're most likely to have seen him last.
Al Bundy of Married With Children
Where he returned to form.
Modern Family
Why you should care:
Sure, Modern Family is another fast-paced clever family sitcom that was birthed in the death of Arrested Development. AND Ed O'Neill is playing the patriarch again but his take on the role is a far cry from toilet-flushing Al. He's funny, heart-felt and has strong comedic timing.
7. Nicolas Cage
Where you're most likely to have seen him last.
National Treasure
Where he returned to form.
Kick-ass
Why you should care:
Don't let his litany of action fluff fool you, Nicolas Cage is an incredible actor. He's just an incredible actor with a sense of humor. Numerous interviews have high-lighted that the star of such films as Raising Arizona, Wild at Heart and Moonstruck knows exactly what roles he's taking. Nonetheless, I haven't seen him take a strong albeit bizarre role in years save for Kick-Ass where he plays the vengeful yet loving father of Hit-Girl. There's nothing like hearing the crazy Big Daddy voice (that Cage came up with) as he excitedly suggests a butterfly knife for his little girl's birthday.
6. Christina Ricci
Where you're most likely to have seen her last.
Either the Addam's Family as a child or Sleepy Hollow all grown up.
Where she returned to form.
Black Snake Moan
Why you should care:
First she was caught in the "grab whatever work will have you" former child star era following Wednesday Addams and her work on Now and Later. Then she was in the "grab whatever independent work that might bubble into something huge" era of 200 Cigarettes and Prozac Nation. Then she slid into the in between of working with Cursed and Bless the Child. But it wasn't until I saw her in Black Snake Moan that I remembered "that's right! She was great in Pumpkin and wasn't she in Monster?"
5. Mo'Nique
Where you're most likely to have seen her last.
The Parkers and Soul Plane
Where she returned to form.
Precious
Why you should care.
There aren't many well-known black women in the media and even less black women who aren't anglicized to white perfection. Mo'nique is a talented actress but no one may have ever realized her range if it weren't for her oscar winning performance in Precious. In one film she went from the large and in charge black woman stereotype to playing a complicated abusive mother on welfare. In one role she made you hate her very existence while understanding how a woman can become such a nightmare with what has happened in her life.
4. Mickey Rourke
Where you're most likely to have seen him last (and probably didn't realize it).
Angel Heart and Sin City
Where he returned to form.
The Wrestler
Why you should care:
Mickey Rourke has had one roller coaster a career. If you go far enough in his filmography, you'll see someone who looks nothing like the Mickey Rourke we know now. He was a Hollywood heartthrob poised to be a professional pretty boy... until he went back to boxing, busted up his face, had some botched plastic surgery and returned to the screen looking like he'd just come back from a tour of duty overseas. He's a brilliant actor, but it was his turn in The Wrestler that really showcased what this man can do.
3. Don Cheadle
Where you're most likely to have seen him last.
Ocean's 11
Where he returned to form.
Hotel Rwanda
Why you should care:
Because Don Cheadle is just great. He's taken on a plethora of roles, but he's still most likely to be recognized as the fast-talking bomb expert from Ocean's 11 or the military side-kick from Iron Man 2. In other words, he's best known for his side roles. But his main roles are incredibly well-executed and can wrench the heart. Besides his film work, he has served as the U.N. Environment Program Goodwill Ambassador and he supports work in Darfur. Have real life experience will act better.
2. Selma Hayek
Where you're most likely to have seen her last.
Dogma or Wild Wild West
Where she returned to form.
Frida
Why you should care:
Quite often I have had the conversation where the whole table is trying to remember if it was Penelope Cruz or Selma Hayek in that movie. Usually it turns out it was Penelope Cruz but that's not to say Selma Hayek doesn't have the chops to take on a demanding role. She just falls into that same area that all minority actors do... not white. She's sexy and latina so... she's a nurse... with attitude. She's a stripper... with attitude. She's a secret agent... with ATTITUDE. In Frida, she drops out of her stereotype and into the story of surrealist painter Frida Kahlo who led a life of struggle and self-realization. It's a tale usually left to white, male, artists and Selma's portrayal should not be ignored.
1. John Cusack
Where you're most likely to have seen him last.
2012
Where he returned to form.
Hot Tub Time Machine
Why you should care:
John Cusack came into public knowledge and is most well-known for his slew of 80's romantic comedies from Say Anything to The Sure Thing into 90's action fluff from Con Air to Grosse Point Blank and back into 00's romantic comedies from Serendipity to America's Sweethearts. Lately, he's been taking a turn at combining the two with 2012 and Must Love Dogs but never finding the same success he had in his younger years playing jaded male characters trying to understand love. I'll admit, Hot Tub Time Machine is silly from it's title all the way to it's premise. But John Cusack playing a character who has continually fucked up relationships dating back to his days in high-school rocketing back in time to discover that the problem isn't that he let the right person go, but that he's been such a perpetual ass that he missed the chance entirely is a stroke of awesome.
10. Catherine Keener
Where you're most likely to have seen her last.
The 40 Year Old Virgin
Where she returned to her form.
Capote
Why you should care:
Catherine Keener is beautiful, talented and not under the age of 30. Most women in this area play the hip mom until the day they fade away ancient at 50 or start playing the hip grandmother who shows her bra at Thanksgiving yet gives enlightening love advice to the young startlets who can't choose between their sweet high school friend who's down to earth or their slick money loving fiancee who hates kittens. Catherine Keener is doing a wonderful job of maintaining work in demanding roles that don't pigeon-hole her as "the character who's not 24 or at least looks 24".
9. Katey Sagal
Where you're most likely to have seen her.
Peg of Married With Children
Where she returned to form.
Leela of Futurama and Gemma Teller Morrow of Sons of Anarchy
Why you should care:
As television has its way of doing, Katey Sagal was poised to go down in history as the dumbass wife of a man whose catchphrase involved the flushing of a toilet. I'm not a huge fan of the motorcycle soap opera, but if Sagal proves anything in her role it's that she can play more than a leopard-print stereotype. And if Sons of Anarchy isn't enough proof, watch a few episodes of Futurama and you'll find her voice can do more than hit a falsetto at the end of "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!" And while we're on the subject...
8. Ed O'Neill
Where you're most likely to have seen him last.
Al Bundy of Married With Children
Where he returned to form.
Modern Family
Why you should care:
Sure, Modern Family is another fast-paced clever family sitcom that was birthed in the death of Arrested Development. AND Ed O'Neill is playing the patriarch again but his take on the role is a far cry from toilet-flushing Al. He's funny, heart-felt and has strong comedic timing.
7. Nicolas Cage
Where you're most likely to have seen him last.
National Treasure
Where he returned to form.
Kick-ass
Why you should care:
Don't let his litany of action fluff fool you, Nicolas Cage is an incredible actor. He's just an incredible actor with a sense of humor. Numerous interviews have high-lighted that the star of such films as Raising Arizona, Wild at Heart and Moonstruck knows exactly what roles he's taking. Nonetheless, I haven't seen him take a strong albeit bizarre role in years save for Kick-Ass where he plays the vengeful yet loving father of Hit-Girl. There's nothing like hearing the crazy Big Daddy voice (that Cage came up with) as he excitedly suggests a butterfly knife for his little girl's birthday.
6. Christina Ricci
Where you're most likely to have seen her last.
Either the Addam's Family as a child or Sleepy Hollow all grown up.
Where she returned to form.
Black Snake Moan
Why you should care:
First she was caught in the "grab whatever work will have you" former child star era following Wednesday Addams and her work on Now and Later. Then she was in the "grab whatever independent work that might bubble into something huge" era of 200 Cigarettes and Prozac Nation. Then she slid into the in between of working with Cursed and Bless the Child. But it wasn't until I saw her in Black Snake Moan that I remembered "that's right! She was great in Pumpkin and wasn't she in Monster?"
5. Mo'Nique
Where you're most likely to have seen her last.
The Parkers and Soul Plane
Where she returned to form.
Precious
Why you should care.
There aren't many well-known black women in the media and even less black women who aren't anglicized to white perfection. Mo'nique is a talented actress but no one may have ever realized her range if it weren't for her oscar winning performance in Precious. In one film she went from the large and in charge black woman stereotype to playing a complicated abusive mother on welfare. In one role she made you hate her very existence while understanding how a woman can become such a nightmare with what has happened in her life.
4. Mickey Rourke
Where you're most likely to have seen him last (and probably didn't realize it).
Angel Heart and Sin City
Where he returned to form.
The Wrestler
Why you should care:
Mickey Rourke has had one roller coaster a career. If you go far enough in his filmography, you'll see someone who looks nothing like the Mickey Rourke we know now. He was a Hollywood heartthrob poised to be a professional pretty boy... until he went back to boxing, busted up his face, had some botched plastic surgery and returned to the screen looking like he'd just come back from a tour of duty overseas. He's a brilliant actor, but it was his turn in The Wrestler that really showcased what this man can do.
3. Don Cheadle
Where you're most likely to have seen him last.
Ocean's 11
Where he returned to form.
Hotel Rwanda
Why you should care:
Because Don Cheadle is just great. He's taken on a plethora of roles, but he's still most likely to be recognized as the fast-talking bomb expert from Ocean's 11 or the military side-kick from Iron Man 2. In other words, he's best known for his side roles. But his main roles are incredibly well-executed and can wrench the heart. Besides his film work, he has served as the U.N. Environment Program Goodwill Ambassador and he supports work in Darfur. Have real life experience will act better.
2. Selma Hayek
Where you're most likely to have seen her last.
Dogma or Wild Wild West
Where she returned to form.
Frida
Why you should care:
Quite often I have had the conversation where the whole table is trying to remember if it was Penelope Cruz or Selma Hayek in that movie. Usually it turns out it was Penelope Cruz but that's not to say Selma Hayek doesn't have the chops to take on a demanding role. She just falls into that same area that all minority actors do... not white. She's sexy and latina so... she's a nurse... with attitude. She's a stripper... with attitude. She's a secret agent... with ATTITUDE. In Frida, she drops out of her stereotype and into the story of surrealist painter Frida Kahlo who led a life of struggle and self-realization. It's a tale usually left to white, male, artists and Selma's portrayal should not be ignored.
1. John Cusack
Where you're most likely to have seen him last.
2012
Where he returned to form.
Hot Tub Time Machine
Why you should care:
John Cusack came into public knowledge and is most well-known for his slew of 80's romantic comedies from Say Anything to The Sure Thing into 90's action fluff from Con Air to Grosse Point Blank and back into 00's romantic comedies from Serendipity to America's Sweethearts. Lately, he's been taking a turn at combining the two with 2012 and Must Love Dogs but never finding the same success he had in his younger years playing jaded male characters trying to understand love. I'll admit, Hot Tub Time Machine is silly from it's title all the way to it's premise. But John Cusack playing a character who has continually fucked up relationships dating back to his days in high-school rocketing back in time to discover that the problem isn't that he let the right person go, but that he's been such a perpetual ass that he missed the chance entirely is a stroke of awesome.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
The Top Ten Music Performances that solidified the end of a serious career
Every band or solo performer has a bad performance. It happens, a guitarist with the flu, a singer with exhaustion. But there are some performances that are just the end of being taken seriously. And so I give you, the list of the top ten music performances that turned a hot act into a luke-warm joke.
10. Whitney Houston anywhere after Bobby Brown
There a LOT of bad performances for Whitney during and post Bobby Brown. I included the video from 1994 as the beginning of the end. Her career is dead but she will probably never go. She was too strong of a music figure. But crack and beatings have destroyed one hell of a voice. If you don't believe that this video is all that bad put it next to her early work. Night and day.
9. Ashlee Simpson on SNL
Honestly her career was going nowhere but she might have stuck around had it not been for this one fucked up performance. I doubt there's anyone left who doesn't know the story but, just in case, the younger sister of tuna ass Jessica Simpson tried the piggy back approach of gaining stardom by hitching a ride off of Jessica's quickly shrinking sails to be a "rock" singer. She appeared on SNL where the wrong track for her to lip-sync to was played and, in true artist form, jigged her way off stage. It's the last I've ever heard of her.
8. Adam Lambert at the AMA
If you didn't hear, Adam Lambert is gay and planted a kiss on his keyboard player during this performance that became the gay kiss that shocked the world for ten seconds. I was ready to say whatever when I heard but then I watched it. It is one of the sloppiest spur of the moment kisses I've seen on TV and it completely pulled focus from his performance. That moment on the AMA's could have pushed him from the Idol who didn't win to the Idol who didn't win but was still successful (somehow). Instead, all articles focused on that one, spitty kiss.
The slop is at 3:37. Way to go dumbass.
7. Britney Spears at the VMA's
It almost feels cruel to add this one but the list wouldn't be honest if I didn't. I wouldn't have done it if she hadn't brought it on herself. The VMA's were meant to be one part of her comeback. Sadly, she chose to down a margarita and shun the corset offered optioning instead to go out in a bra post baby weight and obviously uncomfortable. Another teen popstar gets hit by life like a cannonball to the face.
6. Dixie Chicks in London
In 2003, The Dixie Chicks were a country music force crossing over repeatedly from country to mainstream pop. Until they performed a concert in London where Natalie Maines made this statement:
"Just so you know, we’re on the good side with y’all. We do not want this war, this violence, and we’re ashamed that the President of the United States is from Texas."
... following the invasion of Iraq. Whoops. The performance itself wasn't bad but the controversy that followed that concert created an all-out boycott of their music. Two Rules of Country Music: Never insult the US on foreign soil and never insult the president during "war-time". Don't give me any of that freedom of speech bullshit. This aint old-school punk.
5. Tila Tequila
I know, I know. What career? But that's the thing about reality stars, they have a way of never disappearing. Hopefully her misguided decision to perform at the Gathering of the Juggalos will at least keep her from infecting the music scene with her viral rap/club/hip hop/whatever the fuck she does.
For those who don't know, Insane Clown Posse still has a following who refer to themselves as Juggalos (or Juggalettes) who come together once a year in a white trash version of Burning Man. Famously, if you are hated by the Juggalos, they will let you know by throwing bottles full of piss and their own feces. I felt bad for Tila at the beginning of the video until, at the request of the crowd hurling excrement at her, she takes off her top. At that point, I decided she deserved shit and a place on this list. BTW, if you're wondering who the random dude is who shows up and is obviously not a security guard, that's Tom Green. HA.
4. Steven Tyler on American Idol
Anything he does on the show (including performing) that gave the world Clay Aiken is a career killer in my opinion. I'm not a huge fan of Aerosmith but could anyone have imagined in the 1970's when the band was "competing" with Rolling Stones and eventually laid down a track with Run DMC, that the lead singer would progress to doing this?
3. Ke$ha.
Anytime she performs she puts one more nail in the coffin.
Nuff said.
2. The Black Eyed Peas Super Bowl half-time show.
This may be a stretch as I'm sure the peas will be putting out more club regurgitations and succeed in making more undeserved money. However this show was SO bad I couldn't resist throwing it in at 2. Maybe I'll get lucky and the performance will kill them dead. Or maybe I'll just have to do it myself. Anyway, there's no way to describe how terrible this was. They danced around like they were at karaoke and hot wing night in Champs. All of their voices broke which they covered by screaming SUPER BOWL!! Fergie didn't have a functioning mic. This is the only time in my life I was happy to see Usher.
But beyond that, in my opinion, when an artist plays the Super Bowl you can't really see them as anymore than the background for an Audi commercial. There will be no bite, no risks, in other words, nothing of interest. Their rendition of Where's the Love was so weird for a football event I wondered if they just needed one more hit to fill out the medley.
1. The Goo Goo Dolls serenading figure skaters.
I was lucky enough to catch this catastrophe on TV. I'm home for Christmas and walk in on my dad watching free-style figure skating on TV. I sit down and notice the music is familiar. Having loved the Goo Goo Dolls in middle school I quickly caught on to the familiar lyrics of Name and realized, dear God, the Goo Goo Dolls are playing LIVE for figure skaters.
Not to give hate to figure skaters but the band that wrote songs with lyrics that referenced topics from wasting your life (Name) to heroin addiction (Black Balloon) playing live for Kristi Yamaguchi? No matter what they do now I will never be able to wipe this from my brain.
10. Whitney Houston anywhere after Bobby Brown
There a LOT of bad performances for Whitney during and post Bobby Brown. I included the video from 1994 as the beginning of the end. Her career is dead but she will probably never go. She was too strong of a music figure. But crack and beatings have destroyed one hell of a voice. If you don't believe that this video is all that bad put it next to her early work. Night and day.
9. Ashlee Simpson on SNL
Honestly her career was going nowhere but she might have stuck around had it not been for this one fucked up performance. I doubt there's anyone left who doesn't know the story but, just in case, the younger sister of tuna ass Jessica Simpson tried the piggy back approach of gaining stardom by hitching a ride off of Jessica's quickly shrinking sails to be a "rock" singer. She appeared on SNL where the wrong track for her to lip-sync to was played and, in true artist form, jigged her way off stage. It's the last I've ever heard of her.
8. Adam Lambert at the AMA
If you didn't hear, Adam Lambert is gay and planted a kiss on his keyboard player during this performance that became the gay kiss that shocked the world for ten seconds. I was ready to say whatever when I heard but then I watched it. It is one of the sloppiest spur of the moment kisses I've seen on TV and it completely pulled focus from his performance. That moment on the AMA's could have pushed him from the Idol who didn't win to the Idol who didn't win but was still successful (somehow). Instead, all articles focused on that one, spitty kiss.
The slop is at 3:37. Way to go dumbass.
7. Britney Spears at the VMA's
It almost feels cruel to add this one but the list wouldn't be honest if I didn't. I wouldn't have done it if she hadn't brought it on herself. The VMA's were meant to be one part of her comeback. Sadly, she chose to down a margarita and shun the corset offered optioning instead to go out in a bra post baby weight and obviously uncomfortable. Another teen popstar gets hit by life like a cannonball to the face.
6. Dixie Chicks in London
In 2003, The Dixie Chicks were a country music force crossing over repeatedly from country to mainstream pop. Until they performed a concert in London where Natalie Maines made this statement:
"Just so you know, we’re on the good side with y’all. We do not want this war, this violence, and we’re ashamed that the President of the United States is from Texas."
... following the invasion of Iraq. Whoops. The performance itself wasn't bad but the controversy that followed that concert created an all-out boycott of their music. Two Rules of Country Music: Never insult the US on foreign soil and never insult the president during "war-time". Don't give me any of that freedom of speech bullshit. This aint old-school punk.
5. Tila Tequila
I know, I know. What career? But that's the thing about reality stars, they have a way of never disappearing. Hopefully her misguided decision to perform at the Gathering of the Juggalos will at least keep her from infecting the music scene with her viral rap/club/hip hop/whatever the fuck she does.
For those who don't know, Insane Clown Posse still has a following who refer to themselves as Juggalos (or Juggalettes) who come together once a year in a white trash version of Burning Man. Famously, if you are hated by the Juggalos, they will let you know by throwing bottles full of piss and their own feces. I felt bad for Tila at the beginning of the video until, at the request of the crowd hurling excrement at her, she takes off her top. At that point, I decided she deserved shit and a place on this list. BTW, if you're wondering who the random dude is who shows up and is obviously not a security guard, that's Tom Green. HA.
4. Steven Tyler on American Idol
Anything he does on the show (including performing) that gave the world Clay Aiken is a career killer in my opinion. I'm not a huge fan of Aerosmith but could anyone have imagined in the 1970's when the band was "competing" with Rolling Stones and eventually laid down a track with Run DMC, that the lead singer would progress to doing this?
3. Ke$ha.
Anytime she performs she puts one more nail in the coffin.
Nuff said.
2. The Black Eyed Peas Super Bowl half-time show.
This may be a stretch as I'm sure the peas will be putting out more club regurgitations and succeed in making more undeserved money. However this show was SO bad I couldn't resist throwing it in at 2. Maybe I'll get lucky and the performance will kill them dead. Or maybe I'll just have to do it myself. Anyway, there's no way to describe how terrible this was. They danced around like they were at karaoke and hot wing night in Champs. All of their voices broke which they covered by screaming SUPER BOWL!! Fergie didn't have a functioning mic. This is the only time in my life I was happy to see Usher.
But beyond that, in my opinion, when an artist plays the Super Bowl you can't really see them as anymore than the background for an Audi commercial. There will be no bite, no risks, in other words, nothing of interest. Their rendition of Where's the Love was so weird for a football event I wondered if they just needed one more hit to fill out the medley.
1. The Goo Goo Dolls serenading figure skaters.
I was lucky enough to catch this catastrophe on TV. I'm home for Christmas and walk in on my dad watching free-style figure skating on TV. I sit down and notice the music is familiar. Having loved the Goo Goo Dolls in middle school I quickly caught on to the familiar lyrics of Name and realized, dear God, the Goo Goo Dolls are playing LIVE for figure skaters.
Not to give hate to figure skaters but the band that wrote songs with lyrics that referenced topics from wasting your life (Name) to heroin addiction (Black Balloon) playing live for Kristi Yamaguchi? No matter what they do now I will never be able to wipe this from my brain.
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